Mom was very old school as a Methodist minister’s wife.
Author Archives: John Purvis
What Deer?
It is a matter of trying not to throw-up as you heave the animal into the back of your pickup.
My Principal Honor.
I had no idea that the Lord had something waiting for me all that time.
But, I’m Not the Preacher.
You can keep saying no, but in the end God leads you places you never expected.
A Kick in the Rear by God.
A good kick in the rear can teach many lessons.
Coffee Anyone?
The center dipped down to the pedals,….. so my skirt wouldn’t fly up while riding.
Is That Lizard Smiling?
There is no reason to fear. He’s smiling, right?
Sitting Too Close to the Preacher.
You sat down front because you were a preachers kid and dad wanted to keep an eye on you.
Mirror, Mirror, On the wall…
In the end, vanity was his undoing. It was man versus bird, a GIANT BIRD.
Momma is Listening.
My little sister and I grew up with an electronic device listening and monitoring our every move.
Just a Big Fish Story.
I spent much of my childhood looking for outdoor adventures.
God’s Sense of Humor.
I was taught that God will pardon my sins. I’m also hoping God has a good sense of humor.
The Other Side of Death.
On such a beautiful day with the deep blue sky and billowy clouds, I wasn’t prepared for that scene of tragedy.
The Valentine Secret.
Sneaky and unpredictable were two words no one would have ever applied to my mother.
Call Me Chuck.
Chuck the cat thought he was in charge. His curiosity nearly cost him 8 of his 9 lives.
It’s Creeping in Our Bedroom.
What was that noise?….It’s the middle of the night. What has crept into our bedroom?
A Fowl Christmas.
We’d all settled in, on that dark Christmas night…
The Christmas Miracle.
He wasn’t much of a dog to look at. He knew a lot of tricks but was rather bull-headed and refused to do any of them for us.
Too Big To Turn Down!
There is a thin line between stupid and fearless, sometimes.
Killer Porta-Potty!
Have you ever been somehwere so nasty that the “ick” factor made you gag? Did your best friend help you through it?
Don’t Make Me Come Down There!
The preachers kid is an expert in non-verbal communication. Unfortunately, the signals may be ignored and disaster results…..painfully.
Run For Your Life!
There’s a fine line between running for your life and outright panic. I always seemed to be doing one or the other.
Facing Mortality.
Covid-19 made me face my own possible death. I’d always been able to avoid facing my own mortality.
What happened to You?
I am Alive.
Graduation Day!
It was later reported that my wife’s exact words were “Where in the… %^)*_&$… is John?” She was very eloquent on special occasions.
Catch That Burglar.
The dispatcher called on the radio and reported that there was a burglar alarm going off at a house west of town.
Just A Pretend Fire.
A little bit is good, but more is better………Right? Especially when it comes to fire…………..or was that ice cream?
You Going to the Party??
Friday afternoon in high school was a time of great anticipation. The weekend was almost there and plans had to be made.
Dang You Monkey.
Monkeys make great companions, just not on long road trips. They are fine till you stop at the Sonic drive through and buy them dinner.
Where You Going?
I was headed to college unbeknownst to my parents.
Goodbye Momma…
I left momma begging me to save her.
Jump, John, Jump!
Jumping from the parsonage roof with a homemade parachute couldn’t possibly end badly. Could it?
The Happy Camper.
The happy camper found that her words were trajically prophetic.
Gangs.
As a Park Ranger, I had to be ready for just about anything. It could be about camping fees or some type of serious criminal act.
Thank You!!
Thank You for Following and Liking my blog “Call Me Lou.” I have reached 100 followers and appreciate each and every one of you.
So There I Was…
I was tired and bored as I sat in the drive-thru of our local Abilene McDonalds. Apparently, the Good Lord was in the same line.
The Gold Stud.
Dad was a Christ-loving pacifist. That was the only reason I lived to reach the age of 18.
The Flood.
The flood at the creek nearly drown me. I never told mom what really happened.
The Crash of Glass.
The crash of glass was heard as I tried to make it through the door.
Climb That Mountain!
We had to climb to the peak of that mountain and live to tell the tale. Unfortunately for us, we lived in Kansas, so the nearest mountain was over 600 miles away, in Colorado.
My Burning Love…
As a preachers kid, having my girlfriend over to the parsonage was a tricky business.
Fake Preacher!
The security guard at St Francis Hospital challenged dad to prove he was a minister.
Kidnapped!
The preachers kid was kidnapped on a youth group trip…..Sort of. You’d be surprised to know who did it and how he was rescued……Sort of.
Dad Had a Drinking Problem…
Dad had a drinking problem that caused shame, anger, and embarrassment as a minister.
Angel on my Bumper.
An angel on my bumper was the one thing I could give the retired preacher when he was close to death.
Dance with a Snake?
Dad bought Spumoni ice cream which, as a child, I decided was torture.
John Wayne Defends the Preacher?
I went at the other boy like a spider monkey on a sugar high, but Dad had a different idea.
Shocking,.. Just Shocking!
That toy truck flew like a rocket when we put the electricity to it. And nearly killed the neighbor doing it.
Scarred For Life!
Mother scarred me for life when she had me wear second-hand girls clothing and tried to convince me they were boys clothes.
All Time Greatest?
I snuck away from a church picnic to slide down the spillway at the lake and nearly killed myself in the process.
Fire, Fire,..Oops!
Playing firefighter in the parsonage got too real when my plan went awry.
The Methodist Ladies, A Dead Body, and the Baptist Church.
We launched a tire from the roof of the parsonage during a church ladies meeting. Someone thought a dead body had fallen.
The Great Cave Expedition.
Exploring the church crawlspace on a secret mission. We thought we’d been successful until unforeseen circumstances intervened.
A Name to Be Proud of..
I was ashamed by my first name until I found out the wonderful story of my namesake. Now just call me Lou.
Paint job on the church.
I will confess to painting on the wall of the church, but will claim that I have a defense. My little sister talked me into it.
Just a little ornery.
Preachers kids have the reputation of being ornery or trouble makers. They are on view for the world to see and expected to be angels. Sometimes they aren’t.
Call Me Lou. 